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Based on the results of this study—and more than 25 years of clinical experience—I have concluded that it’s not the of a sexual or romantic act that cause the most pain and do the most damage to a romantic relationship, it’s the lying, the emotional distancing, the loss of intimacy, and the disintegration of trust.

As such, I have developed a definition of cheating for digital age that might help couples clarify what is and is not acceptable within the bounds of their relationship: Please notice that this definition does not directly refer to affairs, pornography, strip clubs, hookup apps, sexting, webcams, flirting, chatting, fantasizing, or any other specific sexual or romantic act.

Then I stopped and looked up at him, listening as he struggled to say “please” around the humiliating penis gag in his mouth. I guess I could take the cage off and let you have an orgasm if you promise to eat your cum,” I said sweetly.

In the 21st century, with our increasingly digital lives, the once-clear line between monogamy and sexual or romantic infidelity has become rather blurry.

As a psychotherapist specializing in sex and intimacy issues, I regularly see couples in conflict about what does and does not constitute cheating.

One partner has done something he or she thinks is perfectly normal and within the bounds of marital bliss, but the other partner feels deeply betrayed by the act, which results in profound emotional pain, sporadic rancor—sometimes simmering, sometimes explosive—and the loss of relationship trust and emotional intimacy.

Unless he informed you or gave you the chance to participate in these activities, it was not an honest act on his part.

My poor cuckold husband made an anguished moan and that spurred me to start sucking those balls.

I lovingly sucked each one, going back and forth, listening to the response of my humiliated cuckold as he watched. It had been weeks since he’d cum and now he would be forced to watch his wife give another man the blowjob he so desperately wanted. He almost wailed as I wrapped my mouth around his cock, pulling it into my mouth — and working my lips very lightly over his cuckold chastity cage. And you HAVE endured so much cuckold humiliation and sexual frustration lately, you really do deserve a reward. He was so frantic, so on needy, he’d agree to anything.

One study published in the journal Sexuality & Culture involved a survey of more than 5,100 people.

Participants seemed to follow a pattern of behavior: sexting, then cybersex, then ultimately a real-life relationship outside of an intimate one. However, you may find support in meetings like those offered by S-Anon, which is a free program of recovery for those who have been affected by someone else’s sexual behavior.

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